


Is That A Puppy In Your Pouch Or Are You Just Happy To See Me?

by AsagiStilinski



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Cats, Dogs, Established Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski, Established Relationship, Ferrets, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Full Shift Werewolves, Humor, Kittens, Living Together, M/M, Magical Stiles Stilinski, Puppies, Puppy Piles, Rebuilt Hale House, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Wolf Derek Hale, sbpuppypile, sterekbingo2019
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-01
Updated: 2019-05-01
Packaged: 2020-02-15 20:57:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,403
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18677269
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AsagiStilinski/pseuds/AsagiStilinski
Summary: Stiles wants a petDerek keeps getting in the way





	Is That A Puppy In Your Pouch Or Are You Just Happy To See Me?

**Author's Note:**

> First day of Sterek Bingo 2019- "Puppy pile"!! Based on a real kitten I saw at a real Hot Topic, _bless_

Hot Topic is a land of many wonders

Inside a Hot Topic, you can find anything from clothes to figurines to bedsheets, to candy to kitchenware to ... dead crickets in little boxes assumingly to feed to a lizard

But one thing Stiles didn't often find in a Hot Topic- one thing he never thought he'd see in one..... was a kitten

The day was as normal as any, he was in the market for some new plaid after his favorite blue and grey got shredded by a freaking chupacabra- no, he's not kidding, he wishes he was, but alas- and he had a few tickets of Hot Cash just waiting to be spent

He figured if he was lucky, maybe he'd end up with that denim Thor vest he'd been ogling too, if he could get the plaid cheap enough

Just as he was approaching the Avengers endcap in the corner, he noticed a small crowd gathering around the counter- not to pay, evidently, but to "oohhh" and "awww" over.... something

Curiously, he made his way over to the crowd, peered over a few people, and saw _exactly_ what was causing all the fuss

"Oh.... my...... Thor....."

There was a woman with a little tiny pouch- kind of a papoosey sort of pouch but alot smaller- showing it around to everyone who was looking

And inside that papoosey sort of pouch, was the smallest, cutest, little kitten that he had ever seen

"Do you want to pet her?" the stranger asked

"Yeah!! Absolutely, thanks! Oh god she's so _cute_ ," Stiles cooed, leaning down to very gently run two fingers- wich were _almost_ as big as her head- over the the kitten's soft, fuzzy little head

The kitten mewed, and reached up with a teeny tiny paw to bat curiously at Stiles' hand, and then moved closer and started nibbling with those _itty bitty wittle teeth_ on his thumb...

And Stiles damn near started to cry

 

~+~

 

"Derek, we have to have a cat,"

"No,"

Stiles was _OFFENDED_

Derek didn't even look up from his book!

"What?! Why the hell not!?"

"Because I'm allergic,"

The witch rolled his eyes, crossing his arms over his chest with utter disbeleif

"Yeah right, I know you don't have allergies, werewolves can't GET allergies, and besides, I've SEEN you play with cats before!"

"Actually werewolves _do_ have allergies- to cat litter, there's something in there that makes us sick, I'm not sure what it is but it's sort of universal amongst shapeshifters,"

"What? Oh come on! Then why hasn't Scott said anything yet!?"

"Maybe he hasn't noticed," Derek shrugged

\--

Somewhere in the Beacon Hills animal clinic.......

_"ACHOO!!!"_

Scott groaned miserably, rubbing his eyes with the heels of his palms and staring down at the cat in front of him, who seemed oddly pleased at his reaction

"I don't know what it is about cleaning your cages that makes me sneeze.... but _every_ time....."

\--

"Seriously?"

Finally, Derek set his book down, a rather deadpanned expression on his face

"I don't know what to tell you Stiles, I'm not going to live my life ill because of allergies and we can't train a cat to use anything but litter,"

"I bet I could if you gave me long enough," Stiles grumbled back irritably

"No, Stiles, but the next time Mrs. Martinez takes her cat out for a walk, you can feel free to stop and pet her,"

Stiles was _not_ satisfied with that answer- _at all_

 

~+~

 

Ok, so the cat was a bust, but Stiles wasn't going to give up

Petting that kitten had reinvigorated the drive he had long had for a pet, and he was determined not to give up!

It just so very happened that the day after the cat incident, Stiles' interest in animals took a very.... ferrety turn

"Oh, hey Angie, what'cha got in the pouch?"

Another woman with a papoosey pouch

Huh, interesting

Angie turned around, grinning at Stiles and moving a little bit closer, shifting the pouch closer so that he could see inside..... and _SQUEAL_

"Oh my god a FERRET,"

"Yep, I got her last week, I know we're not supposed to have pets here but I'm moving out next week and my sister got her for my birthday so..... promise not to tell anyone?"

"Oh yeah, my lips are sealed, like, sealed with craft glue sealed, even an envelope isn't as sealed as these babies, can I pet her?"

"Sure, just a head's up though, she's teething, so she nibbles,"

"Oh that's alright, I don't mind, she can nibble my fingers all she wants," he cooed, gently scratching under the ferret's chin and absolutely BEAMING when the ferret reached up with her _itty bitty wittle hands_ and grabbed at his finger

That's it, Stiles was going to die of cute

 

~+~

 

"Derek, we have to get a ferret,"

"No,"

Stiles had waited outside of the apartment for over an hour for Derek to get home and now he was, evidently, learning his lesson for putting so much stock in the idea that waiting for him would somehow be charming or atleast that he could catch Derek off guard and get him to say yes, weather he really meant it or not

"Wow, way to completely shut me down a-fucking-gain without even listening to me," Stiles huffed in annoyance

"Stiles, we are not getting a ferret,"

"Why though!? What do you have against the weasley inclined!?"

"I have nothing against the so-called 'weasley inclined', but ferrets are not the kind of pet I would want,"

"But WHY though?" Stiles protested, jumping to his feet and pouting as Derek took his key out to open the apartment door

_"Bella no!! Don't poop in the corner again!! Wait a minute... is that my lipstick?! You little rat! Bring that back!!"_

" _That's_ why," Derek insisted blandly, opening the door to the apartment

"What? Because she's not potty-trained and stole some lipstick? She's a baby Derek! All babies are like that, even people-babies!" he was carefully avoiding using the word "human"

He was pretty sure his and Derek's kids wouldn't be human, after all

"I mean hell, OUR babies will be like that too!"

"Our babies don't exclusively poop in corners,"

"What? Ferrets do NOT exclusively poop in corners, that's rediculous,"

 

~+~

 

"Yep, they exclusively poop in corners,"

Stiles' mouth was practically on the floor at this information

"You've gotta be kidding me..."

"Nope, I'm not really sure why, they just... _do_ ," Scott shrugged, sniffling a little in allergy-related misery as he finished cleaning out one of the cat cages

"Damn...."

"Is that the only reason Derek said no?"

"Well... no, he also said that they were too mischevious, besides being little theives they apparently find a way to fit in all sorts of places they don't belong, he said his cousin had one once that got stuck in a dish washer and a dryer hose.... plus they're also litter trained, go fucking figure,"

"Ah... sorry to hear that though, ferrets are pretty cool, REALLY hard to take care of but... pretty cool," Scott shrugged, gently picking up the cat who currently inhabited the cage and setting him back inside before shutting the door

"Yeah, no kidding," Stiles sighed back

"I just wish there was a way for us to get a pet...."

"Well what about a dog? Dogs are pretty much the perfect pet right? I mean, you'd both want one, wouldn't you?"

"Yeah but as Derek reminded me last night- AGAIN-, our building has a strict no pets code, I was hoping we could always just sneak in a cat or a ferret because they're pretty quiet- well, SOME cats are pretty quiet- but a dog? No way, they bark and we get evicted,"

"What a shame," Scott frowned sympathetically, opening another cat cage... and promptly sneezing

"Yeah it is.... by the way buddy, have you ever considered that you might be allergic to that cat litter?"

"Allergic to what now?"

 

~+~

 

Ofcourse, the thing is, not ALL dog-like animals barked

And when Stiles said "dog like animal" he was, ofcourse, referring to werewolves

Werewolves were perfect! A boyfreind and a dog all in one!

The problem was convincing Derek of this

Not that Derek didn't love being in wolf form but he was pretty sure he'd have a hard time convincing him to wear the Captain America themed collar he had picked out....

Luckily, American Gods provided the perfect opportunity to broach this subject

"Awww isn't that cute Derek? She calls him 'Puppy'...."

Derek, who knew damn good and well that Stiles had been watching this show since season one with him, knew that his boyfreind bringing that up was far from a coincidence

"What do you want, Stiles?"

"What? How dare you? I was just commenting on a really endearing petname that I, for one, think needs to be normalized-"

"It's not GOING to be normalized in this household,"

"Why not!? People call girls 'kitten' all the time, why _not_ call boys 'puppy'?"

"Because the only people who call their significant other than are a lying zombie cheater, people involved in a kind of BDSM that we don't use, and- I hate that I know this- but apparently a variety of Yu-Gi-Oh porn on your laptop,"

"... How _do_ you know that?"

"You left it open on the coffee table the other day, I went to Google the showtimes for 'Endgame' and got scarred for life, _thank you_ ,"

Stiles winced, hissing a little

Yeah ok in this instance he didn't come off looking the best...

"Ok, sorry for your trauma, but that aside, I was just thinking.... wouldn't this evening be even nicer if you were all snuggly and curled up in my lap, with my fingers stroking through your fur?"

Derek's response to that was simply to sit his entire human-sized ass in Stiles' lap, pick up his boyfreind's hand, and put it on his head

"Go wild,"

 

~+~

 

Ok so that had been a failure

It wasn't that Derek was against turning into a wolf for the express purposes of being petted

...

He was just against turning into a wolf during an episode of a show that he liked, but the end result was the same and _now_...

Stiles was just depressed

He found himself laying on the couch, listlessly practicing some magic, making little magic-formed birds and cats and dogs and ferrets and - .... and it was only making things worse

Little was he aware that as he sulked in his depressed daze, Derek happened to be watching him from the kitchen

And Derek had one very large, very relevant weakness: Stiles' happiness

Obviously, he couldn't let things go on this way

Luckily for Derek, he already had something in place that could help....

 

~+~

 

"Ok, first this was kinky, then it got amusing, now it's getting kinda creepy, can I take the blindfold off already?"

"Almost, but not just yet," Derek instructed, making Stiles huff in frustration as he allowed the werewolf to carefully guide him along outside

Stiles had been blindfolded since before they left the apartment, and although it had been kind of exciting in the car ride, he was starting to get anxious and impatient now that he was depending on Derek to guide him around outside

"Can I atleast have a _hint_?"

"Nope," his boyfreind smirked, leading him a little bit further...

A little further....

A little more......

Aaaaand.....

"Here we are,"

"Oh thank fuck," Stiles sighed, practically bouncing with nervous energy as Derek undid the blindfold

Stiles opened his eyes immediately, wincing at first from the brightness of the sun, but as soon as his eyes adjusted properly....

"Oh my god..... you rebuilt the Hale house?"

"Yep, I wanted it to be done by your birthday but after those goblins got loose I got a little.... _delayed_ ,"

"Sure, a goblin invasion would delay anybody," Stiles mumbled, taking a slow, hesitant step forward

The house looked better than ever

It was rebuilt from the ground up, with a nice coat of grey paint on it, and it seemed even bigger than it had been before

He guessed that was for the purpose of having pack sleepovers

"Dude... this is amazing!! When do we move in!?"

"This week, I already put in our notice at the apartment complex, but there's one other surprise I have for you," he noted with a smug smirk, his eyes lighting up at the look of utter shock on Stiles' face as he took his boyfreind's hand and gently started leading him towards the house

"Oh my god, Derek Hale you magnificent wolf, what did you do?"

"Not telling, just showing," Derek winked playfully, listening in amusement as Stiles' heart started beating faster and faster the closer they got to the house

"Just make sure you shut the door behind you as soon as you step into the house," he instructed, wich definitely had Stiles' interest piqued

"Oookaaaaay...." Stiles muttered, eyebrows quirked as he followed Derek into the house

And the moment he stepped inside and had the door shut, he understood _exactly_ why Derek had wanted him to shut the door

A herd of puppies- probably six or seven of them- came barreling around the corner to see them

"Oh my god.... PUPPIES!!!" Stiles shreiked, wasting no time in plopping down to the floor and holding his arms out for the excitable little dogs, who all crashed into him seemingly at warp speed

"How did you get them all!?"

"Remember when Mrs. Chantrel adopted that pregnant dog back in March? Say hello to the products of aforementioned pregnant dog,"

"Are they all our's!?"

Derek, for a moment, broke into absolute panic

Stiles couldn't be serious.... could he?

There were atleast eight puppies here!

"Um, no, you're going to choose _one_ puppy, the rest go back to Mrs. Chantrel,"

"Aww.... too bad, but I'll take it! I just have one more request,"

Derek wrinkled his nose, face quirking as he tilted his head to the side

"I just gave you a puppy and a _house_ , what else could you possibly want?"

"For you to enjoy the puppy love with me," Stiles beamed, reaching up and tugging Derek down by the sleeve, tearing a small laugh out of the werewolf as he found himself laying on the floor, being trampled by puppies and covered in puppy kisses

All in all, he figured, that last request really wasn't so bad


End file.
